Onward and Upward - Part 8!

[Upside]

Hi glam-
Sorry that your H is still not feeling well but you seem to be handling things beautifully. No pressure or guilt...only concern.

I have no idea how you do everything you do. You are a mom of two small kids (and one big one), you have a full time job, you workout, you spend time trying to work on your M, you cook nice meals...and on top of that you have your Christmas shopping almost done. You are amazing. You are really making the rest of us look bad!!!

It was interesting today. H made some comment about how in the past I had NO trouble stating exactly how I felt. He said it never stopped you before.

I simply responded by saying to h that I realize that in the past I didnt take your feelings into consideration and that I was working on this area and that it was ok for me to state my opinion if you asked, but that just because I felt one way it didn't mean that I should expect h to conform to my ideals.

This is a 180 for me. I have always been very opinionated and have let h know how I felt, but now it doesn't seem to matter much that h's opinion differs from my own.

After I said that, h was silent. Hopefully he sees me changing in small ways.

I am sure your H sees your changes...and hopefully he will acknowledge them at least to himself. It is unfortunate that our MLC spouses don't always see what is right in front of them and instead ccan pick and choose what they want to see when they want to see it.

Your patience is amazing. Keep it up.

[glamgirl]

Thanks Upside. Your post really touched me. I am trying, but I do get down on the one thing that I want most in my life is to bring my h home and it seems I haven't made much of a dent.

I do see progress and I am grateful for that, but what I don't see is h saying Glam I want to work this all out and move back home. Sometimes I wonder if he really sees me as someone that is worth hanging onto.

Ok enough of the pity party, back to trying to figure out what I am suppose to be doing.

H texted me yesterday and said he was feeling better and that when he was done with his presentation he would call. Well you guessed it, no call. I did text him and say let me know about Monday. He is suppose to watch the kids today.

D4 is sick now too. Well we will just see what today brings. I had my workout at the gym already today. Feeling so good about that direction in my life, but it is a slow process on loosing weight and shaping up.

It seems like life itself is a slow process and we need much patience.

Thanks all for the encouragement. My faith waivers at times too and then I come here and find an uplifting post that keeps me going.

[MidwesternGirl]

GG:

This is so hard. I think God tests our patience as well because we walk a fine line of relying on faith/prayer vs. wanting to voice our frustrations at/to our husbands.

All we can do is take it one day at a time and try very hard not to get upset which can be very difficult not to.

[glamgirl]

Yes MWG take it one day at a time. H texted me early today and said he had his presentation today and couldn't help with the kids until after 3pm.

D4 is sick today, so I kept her home and S6 is off from schoold today and S20 is working, so I had to come home to relieve S20 so he could go to work. Oh well I am at home now.

S6 turned to S7 today. I can't believe 7 years ago I pushed him out. H was such an attentive h and father back then.

I called h today and suprisingly he answered, so hopefully that means our communication is getting better and better.

I have hardly talked with h in the past week, so we will see what today brings. He mentioned something about taking the kids out for dinner for S7's birthday. We will see!

[Maya44]

Oooooh! Dinner for S7 sounds wonderfully fun!

[glamgirl]

H just called and he is on his way. His presentation went well and he is in a very good mood. He asked about going out to dinner with the kids.

Thanked me for missing work today to help with the kids. He said he couldn't have done the presentation with the kids in the background.

He said he just wants me to be happy. Wow, is this really my h?

Well lets see how the rest of the day goes.

He is calling again.

[MidwesternGirl]

Happy b'day to S7.

Hope all of you had a wonderful dinner. I am also glad to hear your h's presentation went well.

[glamgirl]

Ok had a great night with h and the kids. S7 picked Burger King. Not my choice, but it had a play structure and was lots of fun for the kids.

H just talked a lot about his job and how well his presentation went. We also reminisced about when I was pg with S7 and his birth. It was a special time 7 years ago.

H mentioned how thankful he was for my help. I said h no problem, I knew you had a big presentation. He said no I am thankful for you holding everything all together for us. Wow, I was shocked to hear this from my h. I guess he has been noticing. That was huge for me. I thanked h for saying that and how much it meant to me.

H mentioned how he wants to start working out and eating healthy, since he just can't be sick anymore.

He stayed to tuck in the kids and then left. He said see you on Thur, Fri, and Sat. Sunday he is working out of town, so I will need to get S20 to help with the kids.

All in all it was a nice day!

[MidwesternGirl]

Now that sounded like a really nice time all of you had.

He is noticing and he is letting you know. I am very happy to read about his progress.

[glamgirl]

MWG I am amazed really. It seems that h is more concerned about how I am doing, feeling, acknowledging the burden I have been carrying with the household and kids.

Before, I think he was really me me me focused. I don't see that as much.

I don't know where this crazy life is headed. He does seem to enjoy hanging out with us. That is nice!