I have requested for my screen name to be changed on a couple of occasions. I have gone to the FAQ link, and requested this, of the moderator. They have not changed this, so far. Should I have just re-registered with a new name?
Well, here is the update on my siutation. I continue the boundary-setting and self-respect exercises. Well, change has come - but not the one that I had expected.
I tried taking back control of my own master bedroom. I tried sleeping there, for the first time in ten years. (Since 1998, I have slept in a guest bedroom in my own home.) I thought this would be a last step, to get back some semblance of a real relationship with my wife.
I went in my own master bedroom, and slept there, over my wife's strident objections. She views that as exclusively her room, and I am generally not permitted to enter there. My wife is physically repulsed by my presence, and patently refuses to sleep in the same bedroom as me.
BAD MOVE.
This has all but finished my marriage. That night, my wife gave me an ultimatum: 1) leave the master bedroom now, and get divorced in 2 years; or 2) spend the night in the master bedroom, and get divorced now. I chose option 2. I thought I could call her bluff, and she would back down. She didn't. Now I am paying the price for this.
Now she is contacting the divorce attorneys. She has advised me to do the same. I live in a no-fault divorce state, so it appears that I will be forced to accept the ruling of the courts. I am contacting my own attorney, but this is just to protect myself, my parental rights, and my assets.
I really do not want to divorce - I have stated this emphatically in the past - but she doesn't seem to care anymore. Nor is she willing to attend any counseling sessions, read any of the marriage books I have purchased, or do anything to save our marriage. She simply wants out.
It seems like I threw away my marriage, for no good reason, whatsoever. I am now sinking into a deep, deep depression. I am now focusing what energies on trying to survive the battle of endurance, that I know is coming.
