Is she is or is she ain't (my baby)?

[forward]

Sleeper, I am sorry. I know this hurts. And your situation seems very confusing. But after watching a lot of vacillation from you, I do think it will be best for you to go dim/dark.

Keep in mind that you need to do it consistently and for a long period of time--minimum of two weeks per book!! I have been dim/dark for much longer than that now and it is good for ME. I have started to rebuild my life and do things that mean something to me. I am not thinking of H all the time. I am still sad but another pro is that I am not angry (except when H rails at me--he IS still angry).

I believe the book says to experiment and monitor results. You have been at this stage for some time.

So. Contact is business only. No more favors. If asked, you have plans. Be firm but friendly. End conversations first. Do not volunteer information about your personal life. No lingering.