Carlos, I am concerned that this situation could become another "domestic violence" incident instigated by her where you become physical to protect yourself or her. It's hard to say whether she is consciously manipulating, or just that out of touch with reality.
What other possibilities are there for the baby hand-off? Could you use one of those agencies which exist for the purpose of child exchange between parents? It would involve some additional hassle but could be well worth it. Because she has indicated that she feels threatened by you, I would think she would happy to make this change. If she balks at it, that would be an indication that her email was an attempt to poke you, rather to protect herself. Do you have any neighbors who might be available to observe and stand by to keep the peace? If you live in an apartment complex, is there a public area? Or some public place nearby where you could meet her?
I do think you need to get a lawyer to advise you about this. I tend to think that it would be better to not respond to her email, but if you do, that you respond directly to her threats to call the police and the nature of the DV history. I think it would be worse to respond to the email, without confronting the DV issue directly, than to not respond to the email at all.
