Nice to "see" you...I've been wondering the same thing..when I saw her email, my immediate thought was - hm...she's setting me up to admit guilt to something that isn't real...the irony, though, is that if she were so afraid of me would she really have called me a dick for wanting to hand our baby to her from my arms rather than put him down? There's a contradiction in her own email that I don't think she was aware of...still...I do worry that she's trying to build up an artificial case against me...all the more reason to stay dark - and also all the more reason to talk to the right lawyer (which I haven't found yet, btw).
When reading her email again now - it's interesting to me that she wrote, "There is a history of violence in our relationship, in front of [our son], and you frighten me." She didn't say that it was me...so I wonder if there's a part of her that recognizes her own violence...
Never, and I mean, never in any relationship that I have ever been in have I been accused of being abusive - but I do know that when my father tried to hit me once - when I was sixteen - I stopped his hand and held him against a wall and made him stop...I've done the same thing with my wife...and in both instances the blame was put on me - my father accused me of being disrespectful and treating him in a way that no one else would ever dare - and my wife accuses me of being abusive just for trying to protect myself and her form her own actions...
A couple days ago her sister called me and told me that my W claimed I had strangled her when she was pregnant...I can only assume that she's referring to a night when she was threatening to cut herself with a pair of scissors and I had to wrestle them out of her hand...
...hm...sometimes, when I visit the memories, I can't help but think that where we're heading is the best option - separation...divorce...being apart from her is introducing a lot - hell - a ton of peace into my life. No anger, a better relationship with both of my kids, a healthier sense of self...of course I gave up a lot of myself over the course of our relationship - and that's my responsibility, not hers - but regaining that sense of self has been wonderful - albeit difficult at times.
