PM Thread #2

[Kakatal]

Yes, I feel like I am dealing with a child and the deceit won't stop hurting even though I am expecting it and it comes anyway. I thought I could handle the no honesty because I am trying not to have any expectations. The fact is, I didn't ask him why he was not going to be here. He lied outright. I never question him anymore (not for months) but he just likes to lie anyway. I think it makes it easy for him to get away from us if he doesn't have to tell me the truth or admit to himself in words that he is seeing OW. He just doesn't want to deal with consequences at the moment.

What I finally figured out in my sitch is that the reason my w lies to me is that for her it is the easiest way for her to handle the situation with me. She knows she can't be honest with me due to the realization that the truth would hurt me. She says she does not like to see me hurting & realizes that she is the cause of that pain. So I figure for her, she doesn't want to cause any more pain & it is just easier to lie. Put yourself in you H shoes & see if this makes sense.

Feeling much better today because I got measured at the gym and has shrunk again, big boost to my ego. Bodyfat down below 26%, a HUGH deal for me who has always been a little heavy. I know I am also getting fitter and can do more. Also the adrenalin rush is good for the mood.

Kudos to a great job! Nothing better than to start to feel in shape! I bought P90x after watching an infomercial & talked with my brother who had done the program. Having all those endorphins running through the body is the best PMA boost you can get!

Had a full day's work to take my mind off H. Trying very hard not to think about him and his lying ways. Had sleeping problems last night but maybe it's a good thing I don't see him because I don't want to be reminded that he is a lying, no good person.

I work out right before I got to bed in order to tire my body & not allow my mind to start it's games when I am trying to sleep. Read above about the lying.

Will try to catch up with friends this weekend to make the weekend a bit more special and different for the kids.

Do something unexpected with your kids, make this Thanksgiving one that will stick out in their minds in a positive way because mom took us here or mom did this with us

I know about the C, my C is saying, let's just ride it out and then see what happens. I will see him next week and talk. Don't know what other C's do so can't compare if he is helping the situation or not. What does everyone else's C's do?

If you do not feel you are making any progress with your C just bring that up at your next session. I haven't been to MC, just IC for my own issues.

when I get time I'll go back & read your threads.