Life in the Rough - No Golf in Snow

[1hope]

Well friends, not a good morning at my house today.

H started out by being mildly asinine and I came unglued. I guess that the new unknown woman that he has been calling for the past 2 months, along with the recent accusatory behavior towards me was more than I could hold down. He was very cruel to me yesterday on the phone when I was finally able to reach him in the afternoon. I told him that I was having a hard time, and he said "what's wrong are you feeling insecure?" I admitted that I was, and he said, well you're not going to ride my ass all winter because of it! That really hurt, and I guess I stewed on it all night.

I confronted him about the phone calls that he has been making and he flat out lied to me. I cast off all DBing and begged him to tell me who he was calling. He lied again.

Well, his phone was laying on the dining room table, and it was on (unusual for that time of the morning) so I dialed the number, and guess what? The woman answered! I asked who she was, and she hung up on me! H went ballistic and tried to wrestle the phone away from me. My fingers are now black and blue, but he was not successful in getting it away from me. We argues some more and he still would not be honest. The phone rang while I was holding it so I answered. It was one of our plow accounts asking him to come salt. I gave him the phone and left the room. He had still not mounted the salter on our truck,(who knows what he has really been doing all week) and he wanted me to help him with that. I refused and told him that I was finished helping him with all of his dirty work if he was going to be making calls and/or seeing other women. He could get those sluts to help him.

Not good, but I feel pretty calm. I will be surrounded by my family tomorrow and frankly, I don't care if he is there or not. I am really sick about the things that he has put me through in the last year. I am at my limit.