LE Like we talked about the other day, there are changes happening. Remember, relax and go with your heart. It will lead to what you really want. I see such a hell of a change in you, losing anger, feeling your heart. Its hard, we both have had some WTH's this week. Thats part of it, its all a learning process for us. Just continue what your doing, dont make me 2x4 you when i come back. Im leaving today, just wanted to wish you and your family a special thanks giving. Be yourself, just remember that, the LE you use to be, the happy LE. Take care
James
Me-39 STBXW-42 together 20yrs M-17 Kids-2 D-18 S-16 Bomb-96 Bomb-2005 bomb- 3/2008 for a year Separated 5/08 Filing in July Today.... Slowly learning a new life!
((((LE))))! Hang on tight! She's reaching out for sure. What you do about it is all in your hands.
But if things continue to progress and you find that the only thing holding you back is fear of what the future might hold, remember that there are no guarantee's in life. No assurances that this or the other or the other will turn out like you expected. Don't let your fear stand in the way...I know that's easier said than done...And, I'm not sure I could take that advice myself...but I did want to point it out!
Love you! Amy
Me 39 H 36 S 7 S 4 T 15 M 12 H out 8/1/08 OW confirmed 8/6/08 D final on 6/12/09...I'm doing good!
Made it back to the office and catching up on some threads. I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving, except Arthur for whom as a Brit our American Thanksgiving probably holds no real consequence. So to you Arthur, I will just say have a good day on Thursday!
Journaling--I didn't get a call from my kids last night and the phone has been silent all day. I feel like W has bought a little time so she is now going to play silent again. She is big on the holidays and maybe that will knock a few more bricks loose for us. Also, our anniversary is this weekend and that may also weigh heavily on her mind. I hate the thought of her sleeping with OM on our day, but who knows how the Lord will work on her.
I had plenty of down time today to really think about all of this and what do I want. I guess I am like my W and need to give it more time. Doing what is right for my kids versus doing what I now feel may be right for me and that is letting W go. I just don't want to go through all of this pain again and I can still be a good father even if we are D'd. She and I have so many differences and if we agree to come back together for the sake of the kids, what does that mean for us when they are grown. In some ways, I look at my W and I am just sort of put off by her and all the misery she has handed me. It really hurts not knowing where the answer lies.
M42 S12/D9 T17/M12 Bomb 1 3/22/06 Bomb 2 7/11/08 Bomb 3 7/31/08 W Filed 8/1/08 D granted 12/17/08 D Finalized 1/29/09
A man who compromises his principles never had them in the first place.
LE-I am proud of you. Time is on your side. Use it to see how the interactions go. Where her head is. Try to let go of the anger, remember your words when you talk to her. The tone of your voice, do not REACT in front of her or to her. Think and then ACT. Baby steps and remember, when we are learning to walk, we all fall back down. That is part of the process so do your best to not let one night of no contact ruin what could be the rest of your life. As far as your anniversary--that M is done. You are on the road to a new R. I think it was YOU who said that. So don't let it bug you. Make new memories and new special days if the opportunity arises. I have a funny feeling the possibility really exists.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
Made it back to the office and catching up on some threads. I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving, except Arthur for whom as a Brit our American Thanksgiving probably holds no real consequence. So to you Arthur, I will just say have a good day on Thursday!
Journaling--I didn't get a call from my kids last night and the phone has been silent all day. I feel like W has bought a little time so she is now going to play silent again. She is big on the holidays and maybe that will knock a few more bricks loose for us. Also, our anniversary is this weekend and that may also weigh heavily on her mind. I hate the thought of her sleeping with OM on our day, but who knows how the Lord will work on her.
I had plenty of down time today to really think about all of this and what do I want. I guess I am like my W and need to give it more time. Doing what is right for my kids versus doing what I now feel may be right for me and that is letting W go. I just don't want to go through all of this pain again and I can still be a good father even if we are D'd. She and I have so many differences and if we agree to come back together for the sake of the kids, what does that mean for us when they are grown. In some ways, I look at my W and I am just sort of put off by her and all the misery she has handed me. It really hurts not knowing where the answer lies.
LE - I can totally associate to this as I expect many others do. If I looked deep within myself, some days I think I would run back, but that is my loneliness and missing my kids so much as I do not like the person my W now is so why would I want a relationship with her ? It's very confusing, but always take time to think things through before acting, especially now.
GL Buddy and happy thanksgiving to you and all of America (except that Bush bloke, me don't like him !!! JOKE)
