Tired of the fight and ready to hang it up.

[Little Engine]

Made it back to the office and catching up on some threads. I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving, except Arthur for whom as a Brit our American Thanksgiving probably holds no real consequence. So to you Arthur, I will just say have a good day on Thursday!

Journaling--I didn't get a call from my kids last night and the phone has been silent all day. I feel like W has bought a little time so she is now going to play silent again. She is big on the holidays and maybe that will knock a few more bricks loose for us. Also, our anniversary is this weekend and that may also weigh heavily on her mind. I hate the thought of her sleeping with OM on our day, but who knows how the Lord will work on her.

I had plenty of down time today to really think about all of this and what do I want. I guess I am like my W and need to give it more time. Doing what is right for my kids versus doing what I now feel may be right for me and that is letting W go. I just don't want to go through all of this pain again and I can still be a good father even if we are D'd. She and I have so many differences and if we agree to come back together for the sake of the kids, what does that mean for us when they are grown. In some ways, I look at my W and I am just sort of put off by her and all the misery she has handed me. It really hurts not knowing where the answer lies.