W over this morning to pick up kids, asked me if I heard anything from the L, which sent my mind racing all day
I came home from work (I have the flu) to get some rest I don't know if its my W asking about D paperwork or the flu that has my mind racing.
feeling kind of melancholy, one minute I'm thinking of W and thinking about what went wrong, and then I'm telling myself I'll be fine, have to move on; keep moving forward, touched my wedding ring (its in my breif case) wierd day, funny how a small conversation will set your thoughts in motion.
Thought of something I wrote to W way back when this all started its called my ring
My ring
This ring of gold weighs on my mind I was once told this ring meant something This ring represented hope and love Now I'm tired of this ring of gold. It weighs too heavily on my mind. What does this ring mean now It reminds me of my vows
This ring of gold looks so old. Each scratch and dent represents a battle, a trial some hardship or pain Each scratch or dent obtained through the years represents yet another tear.
This ring of gold once meant something It once meant something special What does it represent now Does it still hold out hope for love or does it just represent pain, sadness the madness of life and bygone days.
I still wear my ring, I cannot explain why Its still means something to me It still means hope and love to me I wear it to remind me of my best friend I don't know how long I will hold on for when it comes off it represents the end
Like I said its been a strange day, After W filed for D, I thought to myself, when things are final, I would mail her my wedding ring with the above note. Poundering what love actually means, woundering why things turned out the way they did
Going to go pick up the kids, at least I'll get some happiness from seeing their faces, their smiles light up my day. D9 has been a great help while I'm sick, helping out with everything.
Tomorrow I have another 1/2 day because kids are out of school. Was invited to happy hour, I don't know if I'll be up to it, maybe if I get some rest tonight, I have a hard time getting to sleep, its midnight before I get to bed and I get up at 5:30am
maybe tonight, I'll read, that usually does the trick
Hope everyone is doing fine, thank you all for everything
When you kick a dog so many times the dog learns to avoid you
M45 W41 M10.75 years D9, D7, D7, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 W files for D 07/18/08 Amount of time WAM spent with kids so far this month = 1.65
