New Me - Will WAW ever notice?

[Kakatal]

The main reason I am handling things the way I am is not to fix my m, it is to preserve the above agreement with regards to my kids & their future. My w is not someone I really want to be with right now - she has MAJOR psychological issues that she needs to deal with. I won't want her back unless she changes - I welcome the D since I will be free of her.

Does this mean you do not want her back? Or are you saying that you do not want her back unless she changes and what about her do you want to change?

There is a difference here. The first one means you are done and nothing will stop the D. The second is I am moving on with my life, learning how to make myself happy but if she comes to you tomorrow and says she is sorry, the OM is gone, I want to recommit to the M/R then you are open to this possibility.

Also as you know the D will not free you from her,...ever. You will still have the choice of either being friendly with her and co-parenting or being miserable to each other for the next twenty years and wasting a lot of energy on nothing either of you can change. JMHO so take it for what it's worth.

#2. Point I was trying to make is w is a wreck right now. I do not want to be married to someone who isn't willing to fix their own issues because I deserve better. Because we have kids we will always be a part of each other's life - no getting around that. But if she figures out what she really wants out of life & the result of that is our M then of course that is what I want as well.

I value your opinion - worth more than $.02 to me