Guss sometimes I just feel like the wet blanket here, like I am going to throw a glass of cold water on the situation and wake everybody up.
But hello the guy who says he can't live with me anymore is still living with me, talking to me, joking/flirting with me, just not touching me....
We do things with his family like all is well.
I just don't want to feel 'played', like I went along with everything he wanted b/c it was what I really wanted, while he was just biding his time to run away (does that make sense?)
Yet if I take the hard line and say we will go separately to these events, or that if/when his aunts/uncles ask about our future (sounds random, but just yesterday an acquaintance on the street asked me when Dan and I would build a place out on the farm), I tell the truth, that we are splitting up, I become the bad guy hurting my kids.
Just in confusion, the same confusion I have been in for awhile. He says he is done but doesn't act like it, I hate to have to be the one to pull the plug....and the 'what ifs' get me
What if he is starting to see us as possible again and then I go and draw the line and ruin it
or
What if I let us keep playing house and enjoying the kids and just when I am feeling comfortable with it, he comes home and tells me he found a house and is moving out asap
Sorry ramblings of a tired, drained, disappointed mind...
