I screwed up again

[AnotherNightmare]

Thank you for your advice again. I also think it will be a very fine line I need to walk over the next 2 weeks. I will also need to refrain from any kind of complaining no matter how bad it gets here. One of her main complaints was that the kids are difficult and I leave her alone with them.

I had a good session with the C today. I talked to her very openly about what happened during our marriage and during the last couple of days. One thing I realized while I was talking that to an extent I probably walked away from this marriage as well, at least emotionally. The constant nagging just drove me into some of the hobbies, and like in a vicious cirle these hobbies now became the objects of her nagging. The C said however that she did not agree with walking away from it physically while at the same time stumbling into the next R. If my W does not understand or want to find out what went wrong this time, she will neither be able to repair this R nor will she be able to have a successful new R.
The C agreed with most of my other statements around avoiding R talk and carefully trying to get my W to go with me the next time. All in all the session has had a positive effect on me and my mood.

On another positive note, my W called after she boarded the plane just to check in and sounded very friendly for the first time in days. We had a brief conversation of one minute or so, then she had to turn off her cell phone. I told her I would call her tomorrow to let her know how things went and to talk about the kids. I think I will primarily use the kids as my motivation to call. I will also call her sister's number. I know she is staying there so if she wants to talk she can come to the phone.

The bad news is I will have a lot of time over the next two weeks while I am tied to the house watching the kids (I know I will enjoy that, so I am not complaining). The good news is I will have a lot of time for reading books and other threads, so maybe I will be able to catch up on somebody else's story and be helpful. Thanks so much! Every time I come to the board, it is refreshing to read about PMA, GAL and all the other little successes people have.

AN