Hey Carlos, thanks for your note on FB and I am glad my "story" helped you realise a few things you found useful. I was here in Separated till recently and I remember when I "moved" here after months being in Newcomers it felt like a statement for me, I was accepting the situation and taking it from there.
So, after months of analysing and dealing with whys and what ifs which of course is necessary and important during this journey, my advice would be to try to make this a beginning for you.
This is what you were given, you have to deal with it. Deep inside you know why you are here (at least that is what I believe for everyone here). Going back and replaying everything, although cant be avoided at times, it is a cheeseles tunnel and wont help you much cope with reality.
Focus on you, and the kids. Try to stay away from your wife's drama, she seems to have so much anger at the moment any kind of interaction between you two can turn into a disaster and you dont want that. Dont accept any rules she sets regarding your son unless you also feel they are appropriate and right.
Letting go is hard. IMO, it is accepting, really, that no matter what you do, you can not control your spouses actions and by doing/living that, you actually have a chance to really affect them. Weird and twisted but so true. If you read the boards here, you will see it happens over and over again.
Stay strong xxx K
BTW, dont send the email. Just let her be. "Remove" yourself from her life. That's what she needs now and if you love her, you must give her what she needs.
