H has a pet peeve of people (me in particular)apologizing for something that isn't their fault. Like if he says his head is killing him from a crappy day at work and I say, "Sorry you feel like crap", he will say, "Why are you sorry? You didn't do it!"
It is part of him believing that I take things way too personally (and I admit this HAS been an issue for me but I am getting a lot better since these boards and IC), he likes to say "It's not all about you, BBJ"...Like when he is in a bad mood and I assume he is upset with me when it is something else entirely..
Anyway that is my longwinded way to say that any kind of "sorry" from me, unless I did something specific, is not well received. So I tend to say, "Well that sucks", or "Too bad you feel (xyz) today", because that leaves me out of it...
In unrelated news H just got in from farm stuff about 30 minutes ago. He came in and said "Where do you want this?"
I looked down the stairs and he had come in with two big fountain pops (sodas) from the gas station. I know that sounds really romantic but actually that has been one of his 'gestures' for me. Early in the relationship I used to get irritated b/c he would pump gas, go in to pay, and come out with something to eat or drink for himself, nothing for me. I would say, WTF? and he would say if you wanted something you could have gotten out and gotten it.....anyway in the past few years he has come around and when he goes places he usually brings me something or, if I am with him, will ask me before he goes in if I want anything. So at least he is being pleasant...
And I told him how bad my throat was hurting tonight and he said he would take S6 to karate so I could rest for awhile (Sydney is taking a late nap).
SO now I get to be a lump for 30 minutes while they are at karate...
but actually that has been one of his 'gestures' for me. Early in the relationship I used to get irritated b/c he would pump gas, go in to pay, and come out with something to eat or drink for himself, nothing for me. I would say, WTF? and he would say if you wanted something you could have gotten out and gotten it.....anyway in the past few years he has come around and when he goes places he usually brings me something or, if I am with him, will ask me before he goes in if I want anything. So at least he is being pleasant...
