Cinders, Snow? Isn't it a bit early for your part of the world for snow? I'm sure your home is beautiful w/the white stuff coming down. I do your h drives safely.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
It was a warm fuzzy feeling to have the whole family at home at that point...the kids doing their own thing and us sitting at the table having a good conversation over a glass of wine
That's really good. Anytime xH and I have a good exchange, it leaves me happy. At peace. Of course, I (like you) hope/hoped for a different outcome, but I don't want anger between us either.
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So I prayed to God, begged him to help H find his way home
I pray for xH to find his way. In life. Period. I pray for him to heal, with or without me. Anything after that is icing on the cake.
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When they all left, I went about my own business, and to be honest I have become quite capable of that. I like being home alone again, I no longer feel too lonely.
This is wonderful.
SNOW SNOW SNOW! I am jealous! It was 20 degrees here this morning and in my book, if its gonna be THAT cold, just snow already!!!
H and the kids came home and we all ran into the garden and had threw snowballs and made snow men !!! It was SOOOOOOOOO much fun !
You have to know that this was a MASSIVE 180 for me as I NEVER used to join in this kind of thing...I guess I was too uptight to even try it. At first I noticed H didn't throw any snowballs at me, as he was 'afraid' I would be annoyed or irritated by it (as I would have been in the past), but once he saw that I really joined in and was throwing snowballs myself and kidding and running around, then we all had a blast ! I even ran into the house with a snowball after H, wanting to stuff it down his pants hahaha but couldn't catch him, and ended up throwing it across the kitchen at him...(OMG, is this MY MLC?) we laughed and had great fun !
H had a coffee, and I drank some wine, then later H joined me drinking wine, we talked and laughed and enjoyed seeing the kids so happy outside. The house looked BEAUTIFUL under all that snow ! I told the kids and H heard me say it, we stood outside and just looked at the house...I wonder if any emotions were triggered in him.
Then OF COURSE the 'check up call' came in ! ow was calling him and he answered. He told her the kids were having great fun in the snow and that he would be leaving in just a minute (right...his wine glass was still full !). Whe he hung up, I gathered all my courage (and having had the wine, truly helped) and I asked him if he had noticed that ow always calls to check up on him...he was like..'oh I hadn't noticed..' then he said, 'do you mind?' and I said, 'nope, it's not my life being checked up on..' Then he stayed, longer, I think, just to make a point that he is NOT about to be told by ow what he CAN or CANNOT do ! hahahahahaha ! Oh well, I was just happy that I finally said it, now maybe he will notice in the future ow is checking up on him and sitting nervously waiting at home !!!
Well, we just had really positive evening and for me it was a HUGE 180�, one that I must say, made me BLOOM !
The snow is truly lovely and yes Snodderly, it's a little too early for this part of the planet, but boy were we happy with it !!!!
Love to you all !!! xxxx
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Hi Sweety, Thanks for your kind words on my thread.
You seem to have had great fun - I am happy for you that you like snow! Well, it looks lovely in the sun, but boy I hate the cold. I heard that the north of Europe is burried in snow and the motorways were not cleared fast enough to prevent terrible accidents. Luckily, we did not get that much.
I am sure your H noticed your 180! Have a lovely week. (((HUGS)))
Hello all, M June 21 1991 Speech July 2007 ow Son almost 17, step son 22 daughter 33 Me 55 Him 49 OW 38 D October 2008 Is there any hope at all that because we have a divorce he still may return when he comes out of this tunnel. Everyone says no that he does not love me he loves her. That he is never coming back as it would never be the same. I say it would never be the same but same was the problem. We both need time to think and grow and then with prayers , hope and miracles he may discover that it was he that wanted this and the D was his idea. That I served him as my cousellor said it was the best thing that I could do for him. I can not let go entirely. I need to let go of what was, holding on to the good and learning from the rest. I just pray that he may return. If there is courage and love and hope then I do believe couples can make it better than ever. Please let me know that this is not stupid and that there are those who this happens to.
Cinders You gave me a good laugh! Hopefully your H will see who OW is obviously- needy and jealous We are not the only ones who will learn lifes lessons--OW will have her day too.. I could realte to youe story about the 180..that was me too in my M too uptight to step back and enjoy we are different now//transformed
June Im sorry you find yourself here keep posting There is always hope that our spouses will return..no one really can say whether they will or not It can be a very long process so try to take care of yourself practicing DB is most helpful during this very stressful time Counseling is very helpful Find things to keep busy ..things you enjoy practice being upbeat..I know its hard but it really helps especially around H Peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Hi Peace ! Nice to see you dropping in ! Hope all is well !
June21, I'm sorry to find you in this situation, hopefully you will find some support and even some good advice from reading and posting here. If ever you need to ask anything, you are welkom to, there are many here who have been here for years, and some have even managed to save their marriages, so yes, there is HOPE, there is always HOPE !
Take care xxx
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
hahaha but couldn't catch him, and ended up throwing it across the kitchen at him...(OMG, is this MY MLC?) we laughed and had great fun !