Step Number 1 - Part 2

[Jamesjohn]

I believe that it will get easier as time goes on...fewer flashbacks, fewer nightmares, etc.

I'm seeing this to be true. Even though it does seem to take a lot of time.

The "triggers" seem to be a kind of wierd thing, too. They seem to come out of nowhere at times. I have found, though, that they come around more often when the general "temperature" of the relationship is "low". When I see things starting to get back to the way they used to be, or maybe in limbo, with no signs of forward movement.

For me, the triggers are a sign to start taking a closer look at some of the "little things" that aren't going quite right in the R, and shift the focus to there. Not always easy to do, but much less painful for me than dwelling on the A.