If she would rather text this guy rather than reassure her husband then that says alot. She should be kissing your butt for taking her back when she is pregnant with another man's kid.
Just got back into town. My advice would have been to let her know that you can't stop her, but that:
a) you appreciate her being honest with you, and telling you; and
b) considering all that's happened between the two of you, you are NOT AT ALL comfortable with this.
If she responded with "You have nothing to worry about," then just say "Please don't tell me how to feel -- considering all that's happened with you and OM, I feel threatened here, and I don't think our marriage is in a strong enough place right now for you to intentionally add yet ANOTHER person into the mix that's not your husband."
And leave it up to HER as to how she wants to respond to your concern.
Then again, she's never cared about your concerns in the past, so I don't expect her to now.
Well put, but I was emotionally distant before we split up, and didn't take her concerns seriously and I didn't heed the warning signs, so even though it doesn't make it right for her to do it, I can't really expect her to go all out in comforting my worries or concerns
M 31 W 26 M 6 S 6 S 3 Separated 6/2008 Back together 10/2008 All you need is love
alright here's the scoop, and I need some advice.....
wife got back from her week long vacation. I got a great big hug, then we laid in bed for an hour, holding hands and talking about her trip.
nothing ended up happening between her and the other guy out there; I know this because she wouldn't have held my hand, asked me to call off of work tonight, and she would have said "we need to talk..."
problem is, she isn't intimate with me other than holding hands. I feel like she told me she wanted to work things out just to have someone keep her company. She has told me she has trouble being attracted to me because she was intimate with someone else. We've had sex twice since we started talking again, and those were the only two times there was kissing between us.
I don't NEED to get laid. that's not the point. I just want to know what is up, and how to approach her. Obviously I should tell her how I feel and ask what we can BOTH do to fix this. any other ideas?
M 31 W 26 M 6 S 6 S 3 Separated 6/2008 Back together 10/2008 All you need is love
nothing ended up happening between her and the other guy out there; I know this because she wouldn't have held my hand, asked me to call off of work tonight, and she would have said "we need to talk..."
MAYBE. But that's not even the point. The fact that she would have even GONE indicates that she is still TOTALLY CLUELESS about what you need at this point, and what her role needs to be in any potential healing of her marriage to you.
Personally, I think she went out there to pursue this other new guy, it didn't work out, and so she comes running home to hold BC's hand.
She seems to need a best friend more than she needs a husband.
her mom asked her to go out there with her about 3 months ago. It was a completely family based vacation. Besides, her mom kept an eye on her the entire time and told me I didn't have anything to worry about while they were there.
M 31 W 26 M 6 S 6 S 3 Separated 6/2008 Back together 10/2008 All you need is love
there was absolutely no contact with this guy before she arrived there. just a family friend. I wouldn't say I overreacted, given what she's put me through.
M 31 W 26 M 6 S 6 S 3 Separated 6/2008 Back together 10/2008 All you need is love
