STEPPING out...

[cagzmom]

this even life with no rollercoaster is actually uncomfortable.

it is strange - the life the mlcr lives on hte outside looks inviting and fun. no responsibility - no strings - go go go. to me it looks inviting..and yes i get jealous of those who get to ride it with him.

then..teh other day i said that very thing to my sister. she said "do it...what is stopping you...." and then i said i CANT do that it isn't me..it would make me puke (talking about spending what i dont have etc.) She said EXACTLY!!! AND if you were on that ride with xh you would have that SAME anxiety.

so - i guess in a wierd way this is a blessing..though not the blessing i wanted.