(((((MT)))) I've been there sunshine! Kel is right, I think it was the alcohol, for both of you. And, I don't think it was a bad thing. I know that you are going to feel terrible as you read this, but it will be ok. I felt that things were coming to a head for you. Sometimes you need a small explosion to get the air cleared.
I think what you do today will be very important. I think you started to set your boundary last night, and H tried to create a situation so his hand was forced. Let it go.
How you react today will be important. Do not apologize or try to cling to him. Keep you head up and tell him that you are not willing to share.
It was very clear to me while reading your post that he still cares about you very much. He is very much in a MLC fog. He said:
Quote:
H says no you don't if I am not with you you don't want me to be happy.
I can't tell you how many times I heard the very same thing. He is almost howling with pain now. But you know what. It is self inflicted pain. You are not the cause of it. Though he may try to make it seem that you are, because you are making him stay. You aren't making him stay. If he wanted to be with her weeks ago, he would be.
It is very plain that he does not want to live with this woman and her kids. He is still in the fog though and does not want to have to make a choice.
It looks to me like his behavior last night was push, because he is trying to make it your choice.
I'm so sorry that it got physical. He is in pain, he is trying to force your hand so that he does not have to make a painful choice, or a bad mistake. If it is your choice/fault he does not have to choose.
He did not take his clothes, because he will be back. Probably today. Keep your head up and do not cave. This will be very important. Stay strong. You do not want him to leave, but you will no longer share him with another woman. Let him choose.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
