It really sounds like things are going well for you and your H. I love the flirting bit especially. I need to try and do that myself.
In terms of the female friends and the marriage, I know things aren't where you want them to be yet in your marriage, but I don't think he is choosing his friendships over the marriage. You are still married, still spending nights together, cuddling etc. For whatever reason, and you would know what those reasons were, your M broke down and as you've mentioned part of it may have been due to issues around jealousy etc. I think when the WAHs are so frustrated, feeling smothered etc., it seems like they really act out and act like everything matters more than the M, i.e. everything they weren't "allowed" to have before. I truly think if you just "allow" these things, and show that you aren't impacted, they will become less important to your H. Does that make sense or seem reasonable? I might be reading my own sitch in yours, but as you've said it seems most of the Ws on here have/had issues with being controlling etc. I can say that my H felt like he wasn't allowed to go out and do things. When we first S, he went out all of the time, and made loads of new friends, even though by nature he's not really an extrovert and prefers to stay in and play video games. He did things with his new friends that were things I always wanted us to do together, like going hiking etc. This gutted me, but it seems now like he was rebelling against me in a way. Now, he rarely goes out, and I think part of the reason for that is that when he does, I just ask about his night instead of freaking out. Not trying to hijack, just giving an example...
How did Jody feel about the progress in your sitch? Did she see you as being on the right path? Do you feel like things are getting better?
I wouldn't worry about the sending food home with your H. I think this is a kind, nurturing thing to do, and you're not in a place where you need to be dark and show him what life is like without you. Seems more like you are transitioning back to showing him what life can be like with you, and my guess is you are a caring person who likes to do nice things for your H.
Anyway hope to hear more from you this weekend, and hope you're having a good one so far!
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
