Eddie Izzard - Dress to Kill - one of my favorites - that I've actually avoided for a while since both my W and I really liked him - and the last time I tried to watch him it just made me miss her more...but that was a long time ago (at least in relationship time) - so maybe it would be good to sit down and get some laughs again.
I can't help but notice that you've got your voice back, KenF. I can hear you in your post in a way I hadn't heard you in a long time - and that is a very positive thing.
I know what you mean about moving over to this "space" of the separated...it's more real - and it does seem to help in the healing. You're right, by the way, I do live in my head a lot...I try hard to get out - but it's just been my way for almost 40 years now...and it's just not all that easy to break the pattern.
I've been talking a lot with...okay...this is strange...my high school girlfriend lately...she lives in LA - and has just ended a ten-year relationship of her own. We've not seen one another - and aren't interested in dating or anything along those lines - so it's just been talk with a friend - and she's helped me remember a lot about myself...like my first wife, she was also stunned at the accusations of being abusive...since to her my problem (at least in high school) was that I terribly abused by my father - and too sensitive and fragile...like my first wife, she said she's never associated me with anger...so that was a big positive to hear from her....oh...and she's also been very good about reminding me to get out of the house - to spend time with friends - and even try to flirt if I ever get the chance...
Sometimes her advice seems to put the cart before the horse - but I think she often comes at offering me advice from her own experience with her relationship - and she felt she held on for too long - and didn't let go soon enough for her to heal and work on herself...
Part of the reason I spend so much time in my head is just because of my line of work - many, many hours home along - working at my desk - not talking to another person or seeing anyone - that's what I have had to work again - and on some days it's been as simple as going out to a cafe...tonight it might be going out to a movie or getting together for dinner with a friend.
