Somer, it is very hard to get on with your life while going through this. I actually was given this site by a therapist. I was wandering aimlessly, chasing an dpleading with the W to reconsider. I thought it was due to something i did wrong in the marriage what I could do to fix it. Wasn't the case. realized after spending time on this site, reading the book and doing some research that this whole situation has nothing to do with me. It is all her and her trying to find her happiness or whatever it is she thinks she needs. she told everyone we have drifete dapart as she had told me, she waicve as to why she left, even told me we had been over it, we hadn't I had no ide a why she left.
Best advice, work on yourself. It is said a lot so let me give you the best direction. Make yourself someone you are happy with and would like to be friends with. When I sat down and did some self evaluation I found things about me I needed to improve and some things I just didn't like. this was before my realization that none of her leaving had anything to do with me. Bottom line is now I am happy with me, very happy. I fixed things about me and did it quickly, she will not change quickly. Make no mistake this will take a while. My biggest thing is looking for her to change while she is with OM, ain't gonna happen. Unitl he is gone, I am distant. Some things have happened in the recent 1.5 weeks that have some of her friends wondering if it is finally over with him. Would be nice, but until I seeit, I am distant.
Two of the best pieces of advice I can give with regard to her:
1. Be dark 2. Do not believe anything she says and half of what you see.
The best advice for you is:
1. Look inward, project outward and be the person you would most like in your life.
