yenk i am so sorry!! wish we could get togehter, i would GIVE u my orange beer can. people like you so help me, you just dont realize it, to take it day to to day, that today because its this, doesnt mean tomorrow wont go back to that.
you are an awesome man, thought there wernt any left here in our state, you and LE prove me wrong every day.
please be safe, we do care about you!!
huge warm hugs!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
Well, is she fence-sitting or is she giving up? If she is still fence-sitting maybe she would agree to a Retrouvaille weekend and then you can tell her if she still feels the same way that you will end the R with no hard feelings? I'm thinking it might help, and worst-case scenario you aren't any worse off than now? Karen
Karen, she is in full fog mode now. I called to check on the girls earlier. My W answered polite short convo, about a min. Her tone was back to fog and A mode. The same one she had a couple months ago.
She did tell me the other night that I could not trust her because her xH had multiple affairs on her when they were M. Although it was different with her since we are separated. I guess by now I am used to such absurd comments.
I waited my 48 hours and have put a lot of thought into this. Nothing else to do, work has been so boring the last two days.
I followed her advice and let it go. I was pretty much there anyway. As soon as I can get the extra cash I am going to file for a D. I printed off the petition for D and I am done with this train wreck of a M.
I got pushed into this frame of mind during the first part of Oct. I made the choice to go back and try. Not anymore. It is not an emotional response, that is why I go for the 48 hour rule before making a decision.
I do care enough that she has a good life, its just not going to be with me. Other then some necessary things I hope she just stays out of mine. I can still pull off D11's B-day and Christmas, come January I am pushing her out as much as possible.
I have been watching COPS and wondering why my job is so boring. Slow county or working so much on day shift. I had to pull in early today, to many miles and to much gas used. Started watching something else got onto this. Number eight is really funny, but then again I am a car guy.
If she is in fog mode she is still talking to OM? When she said she wasn't going to talk to him, did you get a transparency plan in place? If all of that was in place and she broke it, I see where you are coming from.
If she just recently stopped contact and said she wants to work on the marriage, then what she is doing is normal. It's a lot of work to repair.
If she is in fog mode she is still talking to OM? When she said she wasn't going to talk to him, did you get a transparency plan in place?
Yes to both and that it is why I am finished with her. Also, I gave her "His needs Her needs" to read about the healing from all this. Just to confirm on the OM I went driving by there early this morning. Looks like she is doing more then talking with him, the frost on the windows confirmed she stayed the night.
I am 99% certain that is where she got the new ring. I know she can not afford it.
So yes I have hit my limit. I figured it out yesterday this would be the fifth time that I let her come back and try and work it out. I hope she does not try again, she is only going to find disappointment.
I just hope I can keep acting as if. Yesterday I got a call over by the house in the afternoon. I was going to stop and see how D11 was feeling. On the way there I got another call 40 miles away. So I just ended up calling the house.
The closer to the house I got and thought about seeing her I started feeling almost physically ill. Even calling there and talking her was bad enough, had to get through it to talk with D11. I am just glad that she hasn't bothered me.
I am pretty sure I can pull off civil and polite. The first is with the girls. Neither are mine and I have no rights to either one. That and we do go to quite a few calls where D people are fighting and acting like children. I just don't want the drama, I just want out.
Last edited by yenko69; 11/24/0812:42 AM.
A warrior does not give up on what he loves, he finds the love in what he does
Don't worry about me. I am fine with it all. Thanks for the support. I will try and update the last couple days soon. I did pull off the civil, polite and friendship bit.
I kept D11 last night so not a lot going on there. I hate being poor. There is so many memories I would like to create with her.I do feel sorry she is caught up in all of this.
A warrior does not give up on what he loves, he finds the love in what he does
You know she isn't going to care about the money situation. She just wants to be with you. Use your imagination and I am sure you will come up with lots of fun stuff. When the weather is nice, I surprise the kids everyone and while and take them on an adventure. Sometimes it is historical or sometimes just somewhere different to explore.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
