God grant me the patience and the strength...9

[WCW]

Quote:
I guess if I were in your shoes, I would do my best to embrace and enjoy the fact that I had him at home. I would see this as a daily opportunity to let him see the changes that I have made in myself. And I would do my best to be ME. No shows, no facades, just ME, who I am, the way I am, the things I feel, and how I show the things I feel.

Really Bill? This is where I am struggling so badly. I am afraid. People on the board here are telling me not to do this as he will bolt.

WTF?? Who's been telling you not to be who you really are??
But who are you really? the woman who runs all over town and chases down her H and ow and gets caught?
Or are you the woman who has been finally helping her H and finally working alongside him instead of him shouldering the load.
Now, you've had a piece of his pie. You've been challenging yourself and working hard all day and half the night like he has been for all these years.
You now wonder what else there is to life because all you do is the same old thing day to day and week to week.
Do you suppose this is the same thing your H has been feeling for years while he worked without you?!

This morning H and I were talking in the basement. He brought up "god I haven't been home in 2 weeks. I need to get that truck fixed". We talked a little bit. Then I said "I hate you" H said "What? Why?" I said, "because you leaving is going to be like losing you all over again". And I went upstairs and left for work.

Is this different in reality than how it sounds when you post it? that sounds like a spoiled brat that should get grounded for sassing off. You've done it before. Is this the real you or the changed you?

God give us all strength!