Another one joins the flock (III)

[Mike85]

Well, it's done, in my opinion.

I've completely given up on the idea of any reconciliation at all. W has become a completely different person from the woman I knew for 20 years. What she values, what she chooses to spend time on, the kind of people with whom she chooses to spend her time - all different. And not in a good way. She has, by the accounts of not just myself but by our mutual friends and even her own parents, become an incredibly shallow, self-absorbed, materialistic individual who cares entirely for acquisition and appearance.

Toss in the fact that she had apparently been rationalizing her adultery to our friends and acquaintances by describing me as a cold, isolated, insulated individual whose withdrawal from her and the kids was practically emotional abuse, and I can't see EVER forgiving her. It wasn't enough that she lied to me, our kids, and our friends and committed adultery... she attempted to attack and destroy my reputation as a husband and father.

Thankfully, folks in town and mutual friends who sat on the fence, willing to give W the benefit of the doubt and see if she was truthful, have come up to me within the last month and told me not just what she had done, but how they had observed our respective behaviors, listened to our respective words, and decided that W was lying about me. My reputation is intact.

W and I are hammering out our separation agreement. I am acting in an amicable way to W for the sake of the kids, but I will never trust W again or consider her a friend. Ever. I cannot wait to be divorced from her.

During our current S, I've reconnected with old friends via Facebook, gone out to parties and just out to bars and dinners, and rediscovered how much fun I used to have and can still have.

Don't be sad for the death of my M. Be happy for the rediscovery of who I am.