Onward and Upward - Part 8!

[glamgirl]

Thanks. H called very early today 5am while he was at the airport. We talked only for a few min. He sounded exhausted and he is coming down with sickness.

He said call him after I work out. So I called him back and he still seemed like he was in a fog. He is not a morning person. I just said sounds like you need to rest. Give me a call later. Now this was a 180 for me. I do enjoy convo's with h, but I did notice he sounded exhausted, so just let him rest.

He called when he touched down. He was in much better spirits after he rested on the plane. We talked for awhile and then we reminisced about h's past travels. H used to travel internationally for business. He took me on some very nice business trips in the past.

Now I know he doesn't care to travel, but it's part of the job he has. Sounds like a very important day for h, he is being introduced to the senator for one of the states. I have always admired my h in the business setting. He always seems to know what to do and say when I would be like I don't have a clue.

Yes I just decided to help h if I could. Not extra money laying around but I had some set aside that I don't need to pull from until the 1st. I know my h is trying. I just can't wait until we are beyond the money stages and h won't be asking me for anymore help.

This is a difficult situation for me. When I met h he was so responsible with money, had a really good paying job always paid everything, mortgage, utilities, always had money to give me whenever I asked or didn't ask. Then life changed after h quit his job and worked on his own business and then I was the one that worked and paid for everything. Not what I wanted for life, but this is where we are now.

Also it's hard since my inner self thinks that a man should be the one that provides for his family, not the woman. This was one of the reasons I m h. I thought that he understood this concept and I pegged him to be an excellent provider bfore I m him.

This is why I struggle so much in this area. I feel that I was jipped. I don't mind providing my fair share, it's just that I expect my h to carry at least half of the family financial burdens.

Am I wrong to look at life that way? Any thoughts?