For the Guy with Kids and a WW Neunzehn(19)

[hopeful4her]

Not a good evening.

Got to the apartment late. They had eaten and were watching a video. I sat on the sofa and she asked if I wanted a sandwich. I said sure and we went into the kitchen. She got it started, but I finished it. After the movie, at about 8, I ask if homework had been done. Juli says she has some to do. The wife says, "Oh Juli, you forgot to remind me. C'mon, lets get it done."

I'm a little upset that we are JUST going to be doing homework, but start to help her. The wife goes to the bathroom and while she is in there, her apartment phone rings. I hear Miguel in the bedroom answer it and quietly tell someone "if she can call you back." I hear the wife a minute later saying, "Son, you don't have to be so secret" and then kinda laughs it off.

Now, I'd just like to hurry and leave. We both end up helping her and she does some reading and then has to draw some pictures.

At one point, the wife asks "What was the picture my sister sent you?" She asked it a very matter of fact. Almost pissy.

I forgot to post that I tried to forward our niece's pic to the wife and followed it with a text,

"Lisa sent the pic, sd 2 fwd 2 u. Doesn't have ur cell. Told her I'd ask u to call. Ya'll should try 2 patch things. U should be in Linda's life. She is beautiful."

She only got the text, not the fowarded photo mail. I show her the pic and she is "Awwww. She's so cute." I agree with her.

Finishing her drawings, Juli starts to get frustrated and then we in turn are getting frustrated too, because she is not listening to either of us. She is tired. She finally finishes, but is mad. I did something that mad her made even more, because I don't allow her to be rude. The wife takes her to her room to get her cleaned up and change her clothes so she can fall asleep on the way home. I can hear the wife keep asking "Whats the matter? Whats wrong?" Juli won't talk but just keeps tearing up. The wife gets frustrated because she won't talk, so now SHE is pissy. I can hear the wife keep on asking her whats wrong and I step out of the room.

She knows how Juli acts when she is tired, but she keeps asking whats wrong. I hear them talking and they stay in the bathroom for about 10 minutes. I walk to the bathroom and I hear the wife saying, "Don't worry. Three more days and you be back here."

They come out and I'm seeing looks and I ask what is wrong. The wife tells Juli that she'll talk to her teacher. She is helping Juli get dressed and looks at me and says, "What? Why the look?"
I say, "Whats the matter, Juli?"
She looks at her mom. The wife starts to tell me that Juli got in trouble today and wont' get recess tomorrow.

I look at Juli and ask her if that is the only thing wrong. Is she mad at me? She shakes her head.

We get ready to leave and all the kids are saying their goodbyes. Miguel comes with me tonight. Kids go outside to the car and I look at the wife. She asks me why the face. I start to tell her that Juli is just really tired and says things she usually doesn't mean. The wife, looking VERY defensive, says that everyone is tired. I agree and tell her that I also heard what she was saying about being home soon. Again, the wife gets defensive and trys to explain that it wasn't what she was intending to make it sound like. She tells me to stop reading into what she is saying.

I tell her that I'm not reading anything, just hearing what she said. Her words came out that way. She just looks at me with that upset look. She tells me the kids are waiting. I look at her and tell her that I am NOT trying to fight. I remind her that she should call her sister. Again, pissy, she tells me that she may call her tomorrow.

She goes into how her mother and her sister don't contact her and now her sister wants to get in touch with her? She thinks its because her dad just died and she is looking for money.

Now, I wouldn't put it past her sister, but I let the wife know that it was my idea to ask her to call her. Not her sisters. She is getting upset and explaining how she ALWAYS tried to keep in contact with her mother and sister, and ALWAYS got hurt in the end. I agreed with her on this. She she will contact them, but in HER time this time, not on thiers. I also agree with her and tell her that I hope her sister has good intentions and not money. I tell her that they are all they have. She is just standing there. Upset.

Before I walk away, I tell her,
"And not everyone you know are liars."
She looks at me.
"And there are some people that you can trust."
We stand there looking at each other, her about to cry.

I turn to walk and she tells me goodnight. I turn and tell her goodnight and continue on.

I have no reason to NOT believe that OM won't be heading over and staying with her. She showed her flip side that I'm so used to seeing. I can only pull back from her now.

She is hurting financially. She is hurting emotionally. I know she won't look to me again for support, emotionally or financially. She has him. So, I'll back off for me.

She is so incapable of giving to me. Bits and pieces maybe. I have to go to her. She never responded to my email nor my text.

I'm backing way off. Tired of doing all the work. I present myself and she took. I had to console her. She made no move to me. Yes, she let me, but I have to ALWAYS make the move.

And again, where am I? She's right back to her old self, just like that.

The cycle starts again.