Should You Be Their "Best Friend"?

[hoosiermama]

I know I can not be H's friend--let alone best friend--now or in the future. It has nothing to do with hanging on to bitterness, and everything to do with setting a boundary and declining to be used or to condone very narcissistic and hurtful behavior. These are long-standing patterns in our relationship, and it's not good for my emotional or spiritual health. Being a friend now--even if he was interested in me as a person vs. me as an inconvenient babysitter--would be saying I can accept his behavior even though it has been destructive to D and to me. I cannot do that. Whether it's an illness (and I tend to believe it is a form of mental illness) or a moral failing, I choose not to subject myself to it for the sake of my stability and ability to function.