New Me - Will WAW ever notice?

[Kakatal]

3) This issue with the babysitting is tricky. What if a close friend had a similar issue and asked to use your house. What would you do? Take everything out of the equation. Remove the fact that this is your wife, she's got OM, and you feel rejected out of this. What would you do if this was a friend? Personally, if it were me (and the insurance was possible), I would say yes. Is that the right thing? I don't know, but I do know that she a) tolerates your digs, which is a good sign, b) turned to you for help (rather than someone else), c) you aren't on unfriendly terms and d) It will give you a little time, every day, to show her a guy who is strong enough to be around his wife, listen, and show loving detachment (without going overboard), rather than the boy that is lashing out, tilting at windmills. This thing with OM will end. She might not even have to move to AK before that happens. Would you like to be the guy that she picked over OM?

PD I see you points. I'd like to post how i see things & then let you & Tim beat me up some more!

W is divorcing me - already filed & in the works. Has a BF whom she is still in contact with & not interested in making any attempt to work on our m. Why should I make it easier for her to continue her affair? If this OM is so great go ask him for money. He is willing to buy your tits, I am sure he can afford to pay your bills.

I do not see the benefit to myself in helping her with the daycare. I could really care less about any money she may be provide me from the proceeds of her business. Liability is a huge issue since I do not want to jeopardize the house me & my kids live in. I do not have my space now as it is since she is at house in mornings & when I get home, just like it was before she left on her last trip. Basically she has been able to sooth the situation to get it back to the same level it was before she went on her last trip. And I ate up her kindness hook, line & sinker so she still knows she has me wrapped around her finger. Now that she has that knowledge, OM can come back into picture for her since she realizes I will just do whatever to win her back. Feel like I will just end up getting used.

If I do not agree to help her she is going to resent it. So what? She is already divorcing me so nothing is going to change there. Feel w is looking to me to bail her out, using the kids as leverage. Will lay huge guilt trip on me if we have to put kids in daycare so she can work a 9-5 job to pay her bills saying that I am preventing her from seeing the kids.

Puppy had a quote about never rescuing a cheater from the consequences of their actions. I feel this is appropriate in my circumstances. W does not want to work on m, does not want to give up OM, so what does it really do for me to help her? The only way she is ever going to grow up, figure out what is important in her life is for her to hit rock bottom. Why should I prevent that from happening?

When I read your post PD I can see those positives but I just do not know if they are really going to make any difference and will probably do myself more harm in creating another false sense of hope. I am tired of deluding myself & really abusing myself with hope that things will work out.