I went up to the mall and bought two copies of "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay"--Purple had recommended it.
My intention is/was to keep one copy and give one to H but I haven't done it yet...
I have read half of it so far, I am a quick reader. It asks some good questions, gives some good guidelines. It walks you through a series of questions to help you make a decision as to which kind of M you have (too good to leave OR too bad to stay; it says you can't be in an M that is BOTH even if you tell yourself you are).
So far I have answered half the questions and nothing has pointed to the fact that I will be happier if I leave than if I stay. But there are some questions where, from H's perspective, I am not so sure...The big thing is this author talks about how toxic it is to live your life in an ambivalent state, that it saps so much of your time, energy, and 'life' out of your life. That people who walk through marriages for 30 years, debating all the while whether to stay or go, missed out on two other options:
Dedicating themselves to the M, and finding happiness.
Deciding to leave and leaving, and finding happiness.
She said the only guaranteed UNhappiness is to stay "stuck"...
