I really don't look at it as forfeiting my own self respect. I have done nothing wrong. I hold my head up and look everyone squarely in the eye. God gives us free will. Some people, for a multiple number of reasons during the course of their lives, make choices with their free will that do not live up to what God would want us to do. I know that I am also guilty of that in some ways.
Kel, the way that I personally see things is that you began to respect yourself and no longer are the "wild child." You do not forfeit yourself to your H., you "gave" yourself to him in M. You also have a S with him.
What I see you and I doing is trying to live with forgiveness. "Forgive them Father, for the know not what they do." I know that your beliefs are probably a bit different than mine, but all the same, I think that you are able to walk the path that you do because you have great self respect.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
