Yes, you need to ask the questions with some tact. But if you use too much tact and the questions will sometimes get lost in the tact, if you know what I mean. Men respond better to direct questions. When you dance around the bush we (men) do not seem to quit understand what the women is asking.
I think you can be direct, but polite. Ask the questions in a non-threatening way. Show some reluctance when asking. Explain to H that you are having a hard time understanding and that you need his help to t clarify his answers. You may need to re-state the question a couple of time in deferent ways to get through to him what you are asking. Asking him to help you understand where he is coming from. Let him see that you truly want him to help you understand and it is very important to you.
Watch his eyes. If they wonder off into nowhere while thinking or stating his answer. He is looking for something to tell you. If he looks you in the eye he is probability shooting straight. If he crosses his arms across his chest he is closed and protecting himself. If his arms are open and his palms face outward his is open and will be forth coming. These are just a few things to look for. You know him better than he knows himself. Use your womanly insight. Use your knowledge of him to your advantage.
Of course this is a two way street. He can and may well be doing the same to you. Do not show any anger, frustration or contempt to his answers. Stay cool and calm. Do not over react to what he says. Do not become impatient with his lack of cooperation at first. You need to keep relaxed and by you being relaxed it will make him relaxed.
I do not know if this will help you, but this tactic has helped me out for a number of years.
You can do this!!! This is what you have been working for over a year!!!
