Your posts are beautiful. I am so happy that you have found what you were looking for in your marriage. That is not easy. It eludes so many people. But as I read your posts, it seems to me that you still have not forgiven yourself. That is an important step in moving on. You express regret and guilt over what you did. That is understandable. To really embrace your future, you need to let go of the past. That means forgiving yourself too.
