MT, I noticed what you wrote about your H saying that he didn't want to be responsible, didn't want material things....my H said the very same words. In fact, when I confronted the OW she told me that he had been talking to her about those very issues. That still hurts.
But, I think it really comes from them not being happy with themselves, for not having achieved what they thought they would by this time in their life. So they just don't want it!
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
