Worse before Better?

[Sophie]

Hi Snodderly...

Well...he mentioned the friend thing in his D-warning memo...below:

Hi,

I'm Sorry I shut down on you the other night, I just didn't know how to tell you that i have already filed for a divorce.
Look I really don't want bad things for you.
I don't want you to lose the house or your life, I know you have worked really hard at it.
We have been in a stalemate for years now and it is time. I don't want this to get really ugly for either one of us or the kids. The uglier it gets the more money and pain it will cost all of us.
I'm sorry you are getting this via E-mail, but it's the only way for me to express myself.
We will all get through this and i hope that one day we could be friends if at all possible.
Sincerely,
H

I dont' want H anywhere near me if he is still full steam ahead, sure of getting a D.

The only reason I didn't act on those feelings is because I am confused about DBing with this.

Do I continue to 'allow' him in MY house????

I feel I am leading him on....by letting him in!!

I simply could not imagine that after:

Monday...the D-warning memo...I don't respond
Tues...I don't respond
Wed...I get served.....I don't respond
Thurs...I let him know I have no other option than to get my own L. (H asked about mediation instead...I don't respond)
Fri....I don't respond.
Sat....I don't interact at soccer game even though his 'pained' look made me extremely curious.
Sun...s10 asks to watch football with him...without me knowing.

I feel a bit edgy that H would think that I was in anyway wanting him to hang around after how I looked right through him at the soccer game, and he kNOWS what I feel about D!!!

H has not come here and treated me like this over his A, his walking out on me...and now the big D...and he's the best he's been to me in over a year.

I can handle the assumption that he is confused and second guessing his rash decision to send papers when he was in a financial crisis. Remember, a D isn't going to solve that problem for him ANY time soon.

I have a VERY hard time dealing with his kindness coming from some sort of celebration that he finally had me served with D papers. That's emotional cruelty.

I am SO confused how DBing fits in right now! I have to read, read read......