Beth, if you ruled out legitimate illness as a factor, what he's going through now is exactly what he needs. Eventually, he'll hit rock bottom (either he'll get fired for insubordination or he'll physically drop). As much as you want to save him from...well...him, it's not your journey to take, and you shouldn't try to stymie or prevent it from happening. Extremely painful to see, but it's got to hurt if it's going to heal.
Don't feel too bad for him; he actively chose this path. Rather, his ego chose this path...power, achievement, wealth, winning...all sins of his ego.
Your job is to build up a large cache of PMA...enough to sustain two people for a while. In order to be there for your H, you have to start detaching yourself from him, as counter-intuitive as this may seem.
- Me = 32 y/o - WAW = 32 y/o - M = 2.5 yrs, T = 12.5 yrs - No kids - Bomb, WAW moved out, D filed = 8/15/08
