Is this worth saving, or am I only fooling myself?

[Trying2live]

Dash,
I am sorry for all you heard from you W. So you back slid big deal who cares forgive yourself and keep going. We all blow it at times but it matters not. So brush it off okay. My encouragement to you is to ignore the fog babble if you are still in the mode where you want the marriage? It sounds like from your post that you do not want divorce. Now you must understand that most of what they say at this point is from the fog.

Fog makes them self centered, selfish and unable to have normal rational thinking. Also in the book I recommended it explains the addiction to infidelity as well. Have you gotten that book yet? Please consider getting it. Its Surviving An Affair by Willard Harley. Along with GAL'ing and 180 it's really gonna help you. During this fog it can lift at times then they go right back into it. Ignore fog babble, have no expectations of rational thinking while they are in this mode. Dont talk about the relationship or the other person and don't try to be their conscience it won't work and only make matters worse and you will feel worse. Plus guess what Fog babble makes you say you have no guilt! My h said the same thing to me, but guess what he has changed his tune so please just disregard this talk. You don't know when its quiet and she lays her head on her pillow what is going on.

DB'ing to me is great either way. It's so important to GAL and 180. Again GAL'ing will help you stay for the long run of what this may be. And 180 is necessary, because whether our spouse is with us or not someone will benefit from the new and improved you. So what ever spouse may have complained about try and 180. Now again, even if you did miss a few bases I am not saying this is your fault or condoning the affair. Just like in the DR book Michelle says to do your investigating. Why is spouse attracted to that person. You say that it was an EA so there is a big hint. IT would really help if you got the book SAA because it will show you how to meet some needs and also gives a good plan of recovery, that's if that's what you want.

Right now just don't put too much stock into what spouse is saying. Have you found a GAL yet. Was it you that wanted to take guitar lessons? Sorry I browse alot and can't remember if it was you. If you jump on that. Its going to help you for endurance purposes.