Did your W ever see someone about that happening? I really don't think you can just figure that one out on your own. You are a good listener, and responded the best way possible when she talked about it, but you are not a psychiatrist or counselor. I would recommend she eventually talk to someone about this. I'm sure it affects her life and thoughts more than you realize. I know she doesn't want to see anyone, and doesn't want to see any movie that would have her think about what is happening, or talk to you about what happened...but that is because she would have to deal with this baggage she has inside. It will be hard and painful, I imagine. So, rather than doing that, she portrays her tough/stubborn self that doesn't need anyone's help. That's my take.
