Onward and Upward - Part 8!

[glamgirl]

My 2 hot buttons with h are money and showing up on time to watch the kids. Both of these issues spark flames that lead to a big fire.

I understand BND, but I really don't ask h for much. I just would like him to be responsible for showing up at an agreed time. If I didn't have s20 here I wouldn't be able to go to work.

Also s20 is NOT watching the kids he is sleeping and usually it's that h couldn't get himself out of bed to watch them, now this last time was a conference call, but he could have gotten here early and took it here. Not planning!

This might not seem like a big deal to some, but taking responsibility is huge for me. I have talked to h about the money and honoring the time committed to the kids until I am blue in the face. I just have to let it go and not let it get me. Upside running on the treadmill sounds like a great idea.

I just think h needs to be responsible. Not only with his money but his time.

I haven't been on FB much but will try to do some more navigating over the weekend. I was having internet issues earlier. This is what I miss about my h the most. He is an educated computer geek. I like it though. I find him brilliant in that area, since I know so little or pretend that I do.

The computer is my best friend when it works just fine.

[glamgirl]

I haven't heard from h yet today. I texted him and said he was welcome for lunch. I made a nice lunch and served apple crisp for dessert. I know that is one thing h does miss my fabulous cooking.

I did take the day away from the diet. H and I are going to meet one of my co-workers and her h for Sushi. She doesn't know anything about my personal life. It should be fun.

This project they gave me with my work has been expanded whatever that means. My boss called today and said she would fill me in.

[glamgirl]

H should be here soon. I am going to slip into my black boots and jeans and make sure I look hot tonight. It's not very often I get to go out on a date with the man I love.

Oh when h hung up the phone last night he said "see you tomorrow I love you". I didn't say it first this time. I was shocked and said "I love you too!

Check in later!

[dl443322]

GG, I hope you have a great time tonight. Thats great that h said I love you first.

[SirPrizeMe]

See, you just need to chill and he will come back to you!
You know what your hot buttons are - now keep a look out for them and be mindful and don't let those things derail you from ongoing progress.
you're doing great!

[glamgirl]

Ok well we had a change of plans. H called and said I am stuck in traffic and I am exhausted. He said could you take the kids to the sitter and I am coming over to sleep.

I said sure and went on to meet up with my coworkers for a work get together with our boss. That went well. My boss is so nice and supportive of my work.

I then graciosly bowed out and came home. H was curled up on the sofa asleep. He was dazed when I got home. I asked if he was up for shopping and he said sure. He took an energy drink and then we went power shopping.

We had a great time. We didn't meet up with my co-worker for dinner since h was exhausted. While out shopping h was so NICE. He carried all the packages. He was very patient with me and simply agreed with all my suggestions for gifts.

Then we came home and had dessert. When he left he said I won't see you on Sat because I am moving. This means he will be so much closer. I am glad he is finally out from where he was living.

He called me after he left and gave me some more suggestions for gifts and said he is slowly understanding me. He did mention a few times in the evening that we must be having a good night since we are still talking.

Now the way we were tonight is really how our m was before. We really were not the arguing type. I just thought the convos h was having with me were a little strange. Maybe he is thinking I am not that bad.

Well that was date night!

[glamgirl]

It was weird I saw another side of h tonight. In the past, h has been agitated and anxious when we have been out shopping and so tonight I was expecting more of the same, but he was really nice tonight.

He was so patient and thoughtful. I can't really describe it. He was like the h that I met so many years ago. I was almost in tears that could my long lost h finally be coming around.

H gave me money for the babysitter and doubled what I was going to pay her. He was so generous tonight. I am still waiting for s6 and d4 to come home the neighbors have them and they are not home yet. They said they were going to a coffee shop and listen to music.

Praise God for wonderful neighbors. I am tired though and want to go to bed. I hope my kids get home soon!

[SirPrizeMe]

Wow. nice. That is really, really nice.
Remember this!

[brandnewday]

My 2 hot buttons with h are money and showing up on time to watch the kids. Both of these issues spark flames that lead to a big fire.

This is a good thing, you know what your triggers are, and you can work on these issues WITH your Husband when the time is right.

Until then, please see that he really is trying, and there are more positives in your life then negatives right now.

It sounds as though he really is trying to make you happy and it is so important to make sure you make him feel appreciated each time he does something positive.

Mention to him how much you enjoyed the shopping trip and that he had some really great ideas for gifts.

GG, I do think you have every right to be upset, I know how difficult things can be financially when our Husbands are not pulling their weight.

I also know that you catch more flies with sugar, then vinegar, and these are skills you will need to learn in order to be successful in your "new" Marriage.

Communication is the key and being able to convey a message without being snarky and bitchy takes alot of practice. I used to practice the conversations in my head before discussing things with my Husband because I wanted to be absolutely sure that my words were not going to be twisted.

[dl443322]

Whoo Hoo, so happy for your GG. So, take it one day at a time.
Try to count to 50 before speaking when you are angry or punch a pillow or something! Hope it continues to go in this direction for you.