Thanks K, Nice way to start the weekend...with D7 weeping in the car! I guess I should not be surprised with XW actions.....it is who she has become and perhaps who she always was. What is the deal with her calling at 7:30 thics morning? I found out that XW went away for a day....I told XW that when she goes out of town, I should have first dibs at D7 and that the house she is living in is still mine (at least 50%) and that I expect D7 to go to bed at reasonable hours on school nights.....regardless of her social schedule. Don't worry I am calm but every man has his breaking point and i have reached mine I am afraid. It's one thing to be nice and another to be a doormat.
John that is just awful. I don't get people bringing their new boy/girlfriends for overnighters in front of the kids. I just don't think it is appropriate at all. Is D supposed to think it is ok for boyfriends to spend the night after such a short time? (Granted I don't know how long it's been but you know what I mean) This is why I don't plan to date if/when i get divorced, not until my kids are older. If I do date, I will do it when I do NOT have the kids...
I can only imagine how much it upset your D. Sorry John...
You are a good person BBJ...my XW is not (in my opinion). I am actually wondering if she ever was... I would say that 75% of adults would be in agreement with what you state above. The other 25% we should avoid at all costs. My problem is I can not avoid XW....but trust me when I tell you I will not back down from this or any other issue that herts my child. As always thanks for your support BBJ.
John..you are 100% in the right frame of mind here. I have dated a few ladies now..and none of them have met Caleigh because it's way too early for that. Stand your ground on your expectations and boundaries as far as your D7 and overnight stays by AH's with your XW.. I agree with Kalni and BBJ..you do this for your D7..she should not have to deal with this added confusion..
thanks bro.....D7 is now dealing with Wii baseball...i'll do what i can this weekend to keep her and her mind occupied. what is up with XW calling at 7:30 on Saturday morning to talk to D7 anyway? Effen crackpot!
A knife twists in my heart hearing about the sadness of your daughter. I've been told to reassure the kids that I'm not going anywhere.. that I will always be there for them, that I love them unconditionally. Your daughter needs reassurance from you.
I've been told I have control over what my spouse does with the kids when he has them.. which is almost nonexistent. Five months into the divorce he had them up for the first and only visit to where he lives where the kids met her and their puppy. I was sick to my stomach, all anger and full of angst.
My ever so grounded brother kept saying.. "You will always be their mother. You are home. You are what is safe. You are birthdays and holidays. You are the one they call when they have problems. You are their mother."
Instead of flipping out over things you have no control over, focus on what is most important.. your little angel. Know the difference between boundaries and anger. Don't worry about being seen as a doormat.. I sure don't perceive you as that.
Just be the best, loving daddy a little girl would ever want and need. And when their hurt kills you inside, remember it's not about how you feel, its about what they need.
*hugshugshugs*
PS.. and when it comes to tooting your horn.. remember.. it's all about embouchure.
On my way to best buy with my angel....qulaity time baby!!!!
Gyps,
Not flipping out per se...just a little surprised...with what has transpired in the last year should I have been surprised? I thought XW was getting back to normal....maybe this is her new normal.
Thanks guys...
PS I could sure use a little two player mode embouchure ;-) with a designated hitter....maybe I'll spot one while shopping....better go powder my nose....
