Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 12 of 14 1 2 10 11 12 13 14
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,580
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,580
Hi, Tal,

I believe you're looking for melatonin. I have recommended it to several people and it has really worked for them too. (I'm starting to sound like a a salesman.)

I am continuing to pray for you two.

Bless you.


Me: 49
WAW: 47
S11, S7
Years Married/Together: 17/18
Bomb: 6/15/07
Separation: 7/6/07
D: 4/3/09

Real love is a decision.
Marriage is a commitment.
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 1,628
H
Member
Offline
Member
H
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 1,628
TAL, you've got mail


Hope4us

Me - 49, W 49
S22 & S18
Dday 9/4/07
W claims NC 4/7/08
8/29/09 - Divorce Busted. Lots to work through, but we're going to make it.
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 2,866
F
Member
OP Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 2,866
Thanks nc... I'm going to check it out.

hope.. was that new mail, I haven't gotten anything yet. \:\)


me: 37
H: 44
Married for 18 years this june
S7
S3
porn issues, and much more... since 7/06

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,371
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,371
Hey Tal, sorry to see things are stressful for you right now. Sounds like you need a break and some TLC. Any chance that you could get away for a little "me" time?

Just wanted to stop by and give you a hug ((((HUGS))))


M:39
H:39
K:S14;D8
T:22yr
M:15yrs
S:12/28/07 EA/PA
3/14/08 OW preg
11/17/08 born
12/12/08 his
~~~~~~~
Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option


Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 5,666
Y
Member
Offline
Member
Y
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 5,666
((((TAL))))
Sending lots of hugs your way.

Yoyo




Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are.
-- Bernice Johnson Reagon


Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 2,866
F
Member
OP Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 2,866
Thanks sugar and yoyo... You gals are the best.

Get this ... I said this to H last night. Well that commerical for E harmony came on.. and he jokingly says, would we match up. I said no, we don't have anything in common anymore, just the kids and we talk business that's it. He says I was being ridiculous... I guess he really doesn't have a clue.

Yesterday was high emotion for me...I really needed the friend in my H but he wasn't around. I don't know guys, Im dissapointed, worried, and scared. Im dissapointed in him for not realizing what is going with us, worried that things aren't going to change, and scared that one day I will be really alone with no "partner".. maybe Im sounding selfish, but Its partly my fault. Ive totally engrossed myself in my children and working for the business and trying to make H happy, there's nothing left for me. I chose that route, and I know I will pay for it. I know im sounding like Im feeling sorry for myself (which H always seems to mention to me when I try and explain how I feel)...

Blah... ok all that was just a big blob of info..

sorry for the retarded rant.


me: 37
H: 44
Married for 18 years this june
S7
S3
porn issues, and much more... since 7/06

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 5,927
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 5,927
Originally Posted By: tiredandlost

Get this ... I said this to H last night. Well that commerical for E harmony came on.. and he jokingly says, would we match up. I said no, we don't have anything in common anymore, just the kids and we talk business that's it.


Boy tal,

You don't know how may times I have seen that com. and just for the heck of it wanted to submit my name (just to see what happened... NOT that I would follow up on anything)


Originally Posted By: tiredandlost
He says I was being ridiculous... I guess he really doesn't have a clue.


This is a tuff one hey Tal...
Ya know they say to move on, they say to let the past go... and sometimes it seems our spouses have. But they have done so without giving US closure.
I can let the past go... And I know my wife is not going to come begging for me to stay and break down and cry saying she was sorry. I know that will not happen. BUT what I do need in more that just talk that the past is past. I will need prof that I mean more to her than the OM does now. Funny she did not want me to do anything to hurt him but it was ok for him to hurt me... ya know what I mean?


Originally Posted By: tiredandlost

Yesterday was high emotion for me...I really needed the friend in my H but he wasn't around. I don't know guys, Im dissapointed, worried, and scared. Im dissapointed in him for not realizing what is going with us, worried that things aren't going to change, and scared that one day I will be really alone with no "partner".. maybe Im sounding selfish,



NO No NO..

You are not being "selfish". Everyone deserves to be happy. I know what you mean about burying yourself in work, kids and the. I am not one to talk when it comes to thinking about me. But that is changing. Slowly but it is.
As for being alone?? THAT is your choice.. With or without your husband it's your choice.
I know I for one need someone to take care of. I need someone to show me they care.
If things don't work out with W and me... I know I will not be alone... I will be on an adventure finding someone new.........

Heck I may take a trip to Arkansas, Or Florida, or Minnesota
I have found out through this site that there are real women out there.

Now don't get me wrong I am not throwing in the towel yet but I am to the point that if I do need to and want to I can. Heck there are more "towels" on the rack..

Take Care of yourself, Didn't you just get a new car?? Go for a ride and think if me here in sunny california.. It was 88 yesterday.. IN NOVEMBER..

Later
Dr LOve


And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,580
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,580
Originally Posted By: tiredandlost
Im dissapointed in him for not realizing what is going with us, worried that things aren't going to change, and scared that one day I will be really alone with no "partner"


(((Tal)))

I so understand where you're coming from, Tal. But I am sad to say that it is all too common with we males of the species -- we're often woefully behind in recognizing the situation of our relationship with a woman. Usually dangerously so. And while I wonder why you ladies seem reluctant to cut the clueless some slack, I also wonder if even half of us deserve some slack.

So while I am acutely feeling your pain in how stupid your H seems to be, I am also feeing a bit of compassion for his ignorance. I wish, for both your sakes, he would wake up and smell the coffee.

Originally Posted By: Dr LOve
You are not being "selfish". Everyone deserves to be happy


I agree with the former, Doc. But I take issue with the latter. Everyone deserves to pursue happiness, not necessarily catch it. And certainly not at the expense of anyone else.


Me: 49
WAW: 47
S11, S7
Years Married/Together: 17/18
Bomb: 6/15/07
Separation: 7/6/07
D: 4/3/09

Real love is a decision.
Marriage is a commitment.
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,947
G
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,947
Tal,

I'm so sorry that things continue to be yucky, and with the added stress of your schedule being so full, well, it just doesn't help, does it? (((((Hugs for you, hon)))))

So, as Sugar asked, what's up with some "me-time"? Can you swing it somehow? And fairly soon? It really would be great for you.

(((((Tal)))))


Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 5,927
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 5,927
Originally Posted By: NoCodeBlues

Originally Posted By: Dr LOve
You are not being "selfish". Everyone deserves to be happy


I agree with the former, Doc. But I take issue with the latter. Everyone deserves to pursue happiness, not necessarily catch it. And certainly not at the expense of anyone else.


Nocode,

Agreed,
But we need to be careful with "the expense of others" part.
If my Wife would be happy with us living as "roommates". And I am not. Then even though she will be "unhappy" (her expense). I need to cut lose to be able to pursue my happiness..
But I know this is the exceptions to the rule.
I am NOT saying to have an affair to be happy at the expense of your marriage..

Later
Me


And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know
Page 12 of 14 1 2 10 11 12 13 14

Moderated by  Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5