Yes, just like you there are times he has "moved on" and is *fine* with where life is. But, when you think of it, there HAS to be moments, where just like you he misses how things used to be. If not he'd have to be like some empty container with no feelings. And no matter how poorly people think about an ex, I don't believe all these people are completely void of emotions and feelings. I think they ignore and stuff it a lot. I think they have to because it must be so painful.
However, never expect him to admit any of this to you!
The holidays will be hard. Gather your family and friends around and try to find all the "silver linings" and little spots of happiness and good that you can.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
Totally understandable you missing him. This probably will be with you a long time. But you ARE better off without him and I know you know this.
You are bound to have days like this and the girls too. So nice that his family still invites you to things, at the same time it is sad too.
Just shows you that there are good people in this world, even though xh doesn't have his act togeather. A lot of times the In laws automatically take their child's side, but its clear that these people are good people and see what they see. A wonderful mother and Wife who has handled things so beautifully for what you had to go through.
((((lwb)))
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
LWB, You wouldn't be human if you didn't miss him. You shared so much with him. I'm positive he is seeing what a fool he was to let you get a way. One of these days you will find someone who knows what a treasure that your ex lost.
Hugs, Yoyo
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon
Last Wednesday my step dad had a heart attack (minor), and then later that night, sick, very very sick (flu) D4 ended up in the hospital for fluids. Back and forth from the cardiac ICU to pediatrics. What a rough week/weekend. xH helped when he could but worked most days. He met me at the hospital and stayed the entire time she was there. We both left in scrubs, as D4 was sick all over both of us. We had a lot of time together, shared a lot of vomit and other bodily fluids, and cared for D4 together. We worked perfectly together. I didn't feel uncomfortable at all. It was so nice.
Step dad is better, and D4 finally has her spunk back this week, although she loses her energy pretty fast if she gets busy. I was so worried about my princess.
Yesterday my heat broke, but before I even knew it was broken, xH had it fixed.
Today, xH spent the day assembling a wooden playset for the backyard. The girls are stoked.
xH continues to give me his paychecks, taking a small amount out for his gas.
He also is leaving every single night and respecting my space.
These are all good things!
Getting really excited for the holidays!! I love watching it unfold through the girls' eyes!!!
I'm sorry to hear that your little girl was so sick. I am glad that she is feeling better. Funny how your H is a better exH than he was an H. I guess he is happier now, for whatever reason.
I'm sorry your little angel was so ill, but thank goodness she is doing better now. Went through the same experience with S9 when he was just 2, and oh it was so horrible! Truly a helpless feeling.
I hope your stepdad is ok, too??
Also good to hear that you and H were able to come together for D4 and that he continues to help out while still respecting your space. That's really terrific!
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
((((lwb)))) so so sorry to here about your daughter. Im so glad she is alright.
How is your stepdad doing... scary week for you and Im glad your exh was there to help you. Its amazing that he has been so supportive, I wish you guys could have worked things out.
I am happy for you though honey, You need some calmness and space in your life.
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
