New Me - Will WAW ever notice?

[Kakatal]

Do me a favor and go find the thread by SmartCookie that she restarted called "Look inside one AWAW". Read what she has written. She wrote it many months ago but reposted it again. If that does not give you the motivation and understanding of what you W has been through nothing will. Print it out and read it each time life gets tough or you feel like quitting. Its one heck of a motivator. Patience is learned, add it to your list of things to do. If you don't already have enough.

I found that original post & bookmarked it. One of many things that got me to start putting myself in w's shoes & look at m through her eyes. I read so many sitchs here - post only a a few. Working on patience - just very difficult when you let your emotions get best of you.

As for the heartache, not much you can do about it. Cry, go work out, post here, talk to a C. Not much else you can do about it. Sucks waking up and realizing what a DAM you have been all these years. Forgive yourself and move on. Be happy you woke up from it at all, so many men out there are still DAM's and always will be.

I am very happy to have woken from my DAM fog as well as escaping my anger trap. Mind is so much clearer now & feel great about myself.

Short and sweet text to her that is good. Avoid any deep conversations over the phone, email and text. Its hard to see her reaction and stuff gets miss interpreted. Anything deep do the 24 hour deal and post it here first, look it over the next day and then send it if you want to. One day will not change the message but it will help you detach yourself from the emotions that had you writing it in the first place.

I think I told you I have many letters written to my W that were never sent because I thought about it over night. You can do this just relax, have fun in Vegas and enjoy your kids. Worry about what you can control, yourself, and let go of that which you cannot, your W, your M/R.

Tim

Thanks. Will use the board & the 24hr rule in future when dealing with something that I feel need to address with w.