Good interaction Frank. You sound quite detached from W and her fantasy world now.
From the hesitation you describe of her, it sounds like she has no plan. What legal advisor? I wonder if she has even looked for a lawyer that she could afford. She does not totally trust you on your house fiancials, but I doubt she will check in to it.
I think your W has jumped out of an airplane without the chute. Be cautious because if one of you do file for a D, she may discover she has no chute on and it could get hostile in negotiations. It is in a lot of peoples nature to deflect blame in their life failures to others and you would be the prime candidate.
Do you love her still?
I know they say to keep low expectations, but where do you wish to see yourself in 5 years?
