It seems to be working! Sometimes....

[StrgMarvelousWmn]

Sandy--

I can feel your pain and anxiety in reading your posts. You are so obviously hurting.

I know that this is hard, but sweetie, you have got to let go of things. I think that your anxiety and fear of him walking again is hurting you and your relationship with H. He is home. You have to walk in faith that he is there to stay. He says he is, you have to believe him and work on the areas that he needs to make him happy, comfortable, and welcome in his own home. It seems to me that he may still feel like an addendum to your life.

Address each issue one at a time. It is too overwhelming a list to tackle all at once. Do not check with him to see if things are working, just do it. You will know when he is feeling better.

1--Why does he have no life? Why does he have no friends? These almost tie together. What is he interested in, what does he like to do for fun. What activity could he develop that would allow him to enjoy life more and make some new friends?

I have a suggestion. You have a 14 y/o son. Is he interested in cars? My DH and his dad formed an amazing bond when they both got involved in racing RC cars when DH was about the same age as your son. Your son is at an age that building a strong relationship with his father will be critical to his adult life and relationships. It will also allow them both to enjoy time together.

A lot of his complaints are all tied to the same thing--his dissatisfaction with his position in his life. Help him find things to satisfy him.

As always, pray. Pray for his contentment, pray for your trust to be fully restored, pray for God's grace. I encourage you to daily lay your problems at the foot of God's throne, knowing that He will deal with them. It will allow you to start the day with a clean heart and mind, refreshed in the knowledge that God is in control.

I hope you don't mind, but I would like to pray for you.
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Abba Father, I see the pain that my sister Sandy is suffering with. Trust is a fragile issue and when it has been broken, it is difficult to open ourselves again. I ask you to bless her with a measure of faith to put her trust in You and Your might Word. You have brought restoration to this broken marriage and You can certainly bring peace and trust, as well. I also ask you to allow her husband to continue to open up to her. His willingness to be vulnerable is a blessing, even if it is full of pain. I ask You to bring comfort and understanding to both of them. Show them that the pain is for a season and that You are there to meet their every need if they will only call on You. I ask this in the name of your Blessed Son, Jesus, AMEN
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Have faith my friend, God is there for you.

SMW