Onward and Upward - Part 8!

[glamgirl]

Kelaaron I am not sure if this makes much sense to you, but when I say you have to start small that means taking baby steps back to a R.

With my h we could have NO convo's since they just seemed to turn ugly. I know that at the time both h and I were carrying a heavy load of anger.

If your R is such that you have very little convo's and it feels like tension and ice cold, you have to begin somewhere.

A good starting point is to pray that God remove whatever the obstacle that is holding you back. For example, if you have anger on your heart then that has to be removed before you can start loving again.

Then you take baby steps to the R. Like when you get up in the morning, instead of the cold shoulder you say something like Goodmorning h, I am making some breakfast would you like me to heat you up an egg or whatever. You do it with love in your heart and a smile on your face.

Then you go about your day and if things come to mind like h I am target do you need me to pick something up for you or if you are at the grocery store (my h likes a certain energy drink) I always pick some up for him, so he has a cold one when he comes to visit.

The key Kelaaron is to do these things without expecting anything in return. No expectations. This is how it started with my h. After about a year or more of struggling and going dim, dark, no contact etc. I just said throw it all out and be a kind friend to h.

It took months and months of this with not much in return. Not even a thank you. Then one day I started to be blessed in small ways. H would do something nice back or say something kind. I would acknowledge and say thank you etc and now my sitch has progressed to where we are today.

My h is NOT home but he is sure way closer than he has ever been. It's called progress. I hope this helps.