Would you trust this woman enough to have children with her at the moment? In the future? Do you want a family?
I do not trust a single word that comes out of my W's mouth. If she is still in contact with OM then she's actively adulterous and all cheaters lie. About everything and to everyone.
The answer would be a firm "no" in her present condition. I do want a family very much and if my W returned to the woman she used to be then she would make a great mother.
I do not know how long I can continue and she doesn't seem to care too much about whether I trust her or not. She is too wrapped up in herself and what she wants. If she can lie and get away with it, so that noone gets in her way then that's all well and good.
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I can't work out why your W is being like this. Inside I hope that it is because she is confused/ afraid of/by commitment. Unfortunately my gut tells me, from what you have posted, that she is just attention seeking and it makes her feel good.
She is definitely confused, bewildered and lost. I think it's a combination of several factors: her conflict avoiding nature, grief about miscarriages that she has stuffed away, wanting to have a house and a few other things. When we started fighting a lot, and I became more verbally abusive as she withdrew - she asked OM out for a date and moved in with him about a week later(!). I think she realises this wasn't the best way to handle it, and she finds herself trapped in this "situation". One she knows will cause her massive pain if she tries to fix it. She's told everyone in her family "GH31 caused it" but they tell her that it was her decision to run off with someone else.
I am so outraged by the latest spate of deception that I have avoided her myself this week.
Detaching.
I have been pleasant around her but not sought out her company. However, as usual we have breakfast together before work and chat, chat, chat about anything and everything.
As per Phoenixdeux - I have been silent on the threats, ultimatums and talk of separation.
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
