You know what I am really excited about? Even with all the sh*t I went thru last week. I am allowing myself not to be dragge down by it? Does it men i dont care ? No~ I fel good and serene. Not my usual high or low. I am getting well. I am stll having some doubts @ Hubby and his loyalty.. but that is on him. Me wasting my time worrying about it isnt going to make him miraculously change. And once again the phrase to change from the inside out comes to mind. I have been genuienly working on that and dropping the rope. I can feel myself happier and more content. I am going to keep working on me and loving myself. Doing things for me and enjoying my life.... It feels good to Get a life and to let go of the worry... Take care and God bless..... ~Ava
I am doing well. I have been busy and have many positives to update and one big argument that actually helped me to cross another milestone. I feel so grateful and blessed. Love, ~Ava Will update tomorrow. ( Miss you all ~ )
The journey of a lifetime begins witn the first step......FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
The journey of a lifetime begins witn the first step......FIB
You said it baby.... How are you doing? I havent had much time to catch up on your thread? I hope you know your tough love helped me too. I have grown a set ( metaphorically speaking anyway LOL~ wouldnt know what to do with those~!~ ) and he isnt drinking anymore.... almost 100% Toxic free and not based on sex at all anymore. Alleluiah~ Ava Thanks for looking in on me , you are an Angel. God is good~ and so is working your ass off and finally being assertive and living at my truth. I will update today... I am procrstanating and I have errands to run~ Yuck~
Loads of positives for me to post. ~FINALLY ~ I am feeling very just at peace with myself and my life right now. It feels good to wake up in the morning and it feels good to be alive. I am going to see the DR soon cause my bad circulation has gotten worse and now it is scaring me. I thought I was healthy and I hate going to the DR. Anyway, I will be fine.
My Hubby left for TX~ a few days ago and I miss him but I feel quietly content. he called me as he was traveling and every time we spoke he was sweet. That is quite different from what I used to post here just last year. Also while he was still here he did so much with us. He was more open and more available. He painted the kids room and even put a border in. That was sweet too. This is the reason I fell in love with him , this side of him being a sweetheart. This side of him was lost for a very long time.... He has been "dry" , hasnt touched a drop. he called last nite that he was near his destination and he was going to take his meds and go to bed. I was shocked and pleased at the same time. I was so proud of him but didnt say it. I am his Wife not his MOMMY~ I get that now and I see where I need to watch the fine line.
He even went thrift store shopping with me the other day. That is a first for him... he hates shopping of any kind. We had fun together, getting bargains....99 cent sale on clothes and a bag sale too. I am very frugal you know!~!~!~ We also had a huge argument and I actually stood my ground again. I didnt weep and get soft and let him walk all over me like I used to. I was strong, I did it. He seemed to have more respect for me , like someone waved a magic wand. No kidding... he is being the Man I always knew he could be underneath all the resentment....
I have joined Weight Watchers again , I need to take this more seriously and get fit. Also the YMCA so the kids and I can stay active. Take care everyone. Love, Ava
Ava..nothing wrong with growing a pair. However..just remember the old saying that women like to toss around:
Quote:
If it has tires or testicles, it's bound to give you trouble.
As for me...don't want to hijack your thread. Suffice it to say that living under the same roof with someone filled with anger and disdain is not easy.
Stay strong. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Thanks for stopping by ... I never heard that saying.... its cute. I will have to remember that one~!~! Still living under the same roof huh? You are a Saint. Nothing else I can say..... All my best. ((((((((((((((((((((FIB)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Take care and God bless, ~Ava
I am doing well. I feel good. I got my first real nite of good sleep last nite. I am embarking on eating healthier and losing weight for good. On excersising for my health and well being more than anything. It does help my mood to excercise....
I OVERALL feel good and then I have moments of lots of tears. I think b/c things are calmer now my body is allowing me to let out the energy. Negative old feelings... I will get better and I am getting better. I love you all , have a Beautiful day. I am off to work out.... ~Ava
Ava - You are right that tears are good for release. I had not cried in so long and when I did it really helped me to move forward. It was like those emotions were trapped inside of me.
I'm glad to hear that you slept well. GAL away and do things for yourself. The best thing we can do for those that we love is to be healthy and happy. It makes us more fun to be around and they don't have to worry about us.
My W does get a lot of alone time but she is always listening to the radio. I'm not sure if she really knows how to quiet herself and really look inside of herself though.
My W does get a lot of alone time but she is always listening to the radio. I'm not sure if she really knows how to quiet herself and really look inside of herself though.
And that is probably what is missing... Maybe she will find her inner peace one day. I am glad I got some sleep too. I felt much better this morning~ Hubby called yesterday and he is coming home for Thanksgiving. I am so EXCITED~ and proud of him. All his idea. This will the first Thanksgiving in over 4? years he spends with us..... and that it was his idea alone... ...... and he wants to put us first... ..... is a blessing above all else. I feel very blessed right now Cinco. A few months ago I never thought I would be posting this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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