Maybe I should be in piecing part 2?

[Hope4us]

I know Pup. And you know I completely respect your opinions and advise.

Sometimes I feel like I'm stupid for playing things a certain way, but I guess I've done enough of the hard a** and compassionate a** to get us to at least a fair shot at saving our marriage. I just know my W does not respond to anyone telling her what she can and can't do. And the only way we'll get where we both want to go is for right now at least, me giving her some space and time without any demands on her.

I'd be interested in some other WAW's comments on this next part. Some people have A's because they are truly unhappy in their marriages. Others have one because they're in a pretty decent marriage and don't protect themselves from what's going on before it's too late to stop. Others have an A as a cry for attention. I'm sure there are a 1000 other reasons. In my marriage, looking at it objectionally for a long time now, I think my W's A was a result of probably a couple of those things. She didn't protect herself and probably as a drastic way for her to get me to see there were some things bugging her.

So if an A happens, not becuase a person is totally miserable in their marriage but for one of the other reasons, does it make sense that once the behavior that led to the affair is changed that the A partner will become insignificant and the wayward spouse will find their way back to the marriage?

I appreciate the props Pup. You help so many people here. It's just amazing. If I'm ever in NE Fla, I'm looking ya up. Beer and cigars on me!